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2010-03-30T11:43:00.001-05:00

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2010-03-30T11:10:00.001-05:00

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2009-09-05T13:29:00.001-05:00

Hilarious

Clown for Kicks (Mendota Heights)
Date: 2009-08-28, 11:12AM CDT
Reply to: sale-hqu43-1346837248@craigslist.org [Errors when replying to ads?]

I am looking for someone to dress up like a Clown and hang out with me. I would cook you diner - or we could BBQ something. I'm interested in making my neighbor lady wonder. I have already had a man in a panda costume last month - and also had a heard of sheep come in for the day to cut the grass. (sheep do a good job by the way). A clown would be something.
Maybe you could bring some balloons - or make balloon animals to hang in my tree. I'd like to have this done some evening between 6pm and dark. The longer you can stay the better (like if you could stay for the whole 3 hours). Do you have any tricks you could do?
Like I said - I could cook diner and get you drunk - I'd even be willing to pay your cab fare to and from. I don't have much to offer - and my neighbor lady is driving me nuts - so I want to drive her nuts. If you had a Mime friend - it would be cool to see you two chase each other around the yard or do relay races while I time you.

Let me know your thoughts - open to Men and Women Clowns.

* Location: Mendota Heights
* it's NOT ok to contact this poster with services or other commercial interests

LINK

2009-07-23T11:12:00.002-05:00

Not bad...

2009-03-10T21:29:00.000-05:00

Oooh, excuse me.

2009-02-20T16:28:00.001-06:00

This is pretty cool. Click for the pics.

Finally, A Use for Twitter
Sean informed me a few days ago that he had been following "The Real Shaq" on twitter.

"You realize that 'The Real Shaq' is probably a 5'4 White, 14 year old emo kid who's getting his jolly's from the attention, right?" I asked him.

"I don't know. I think it's really him"

Today Sean and I were discussing rumored trade situations over IM, and the possibility of Shaq being traded to Cleveland.

"Well, I just got a twitter from The Real Shaq, and he's at 5 & Diner right now," Sean informed me.

"Let's go then" I said, assuming that I'd finally put this "Real Shaq" crap to rest.

Twenty minutes later we were pulling up to the restaurant and looking for the big black truck that he's rumored to drive around town. "Maybe that's it" Sean said, pointing at an older, but nice Van and laughing. As we pulled up I saw the Superman symbol on the grill.

Maybe that is it?

We went in, and to my surprise the MDE(Most Dominant Ever) was sitting in the corner booth by himself. We gave the man a nod and "Hey" as we walked to our table and were soon whispering back and forth like 12 year old girls at the 7th grade dance.

"You go talk to him" I said, while tugging nervously on my dress.
"No, you go talk to him" Sean replied while flipping his hair.

We placed our order, and spent 10 minutes trying to work up the sack to go say something.

"Should I tell him I'm glad he's sticking around?"
"Go tell him you're his twitter buddy"
"Should I ask for a picture?"

Given another 2-3 years, I'm sure we would have worked up the nerve to go talk to him, but before that could happen Sean's iPhone buzzed with a "tweet" from Shaq.

I feel twitterers around me, r there any twitterers in 5 n diner wit me, say somethin

"Hey" Sean said, with a slight bit of confidence.

Returning to our hushed whispers I asked Sean, "Should we go talk to him now?"
"I don't know, should we?"

"Yes, you should" a very deep voice entered our conversation from 2 booths over.

We quickly hopped up and rushed over like like two eight year olds who had just heard the ice cream truck pass by.

"I know it's dorky man, but can I get a pic with you?" I asked, slightly intimidated.

"Of course" he said, "Pull up a seat" The behemoth slid over and patted the booth next to him. As I pulled out my phone to take a picture he snatched it out of my hand and inspected it.

"What's this got? Windows Mobile?"
"Um... yeah"

He gave it the once over before handing it back and showing off his Google Phone. We talked for a bit, and snapped a photo for both Sean and me before shaking hands and returning to our table. I almost got the feeling he wanted us to hang out, but we didn't really want to push our luck.

"Make sure you put that on your web page" he said as we walked away.

After he'd left, our young waiter came over. We asked if Shaq had actually eaten anything since his table was empty when we'd gone over.

"He ordered like 20 dollars worth of food" the kid stammered out, obviously thrilled to be talking about it, "And he left me a 160 dollar tip. Then he asked for a Sprite and gave me forty bucks for it."

We got back to the office, and saw that Shaq's last twitter was basically calling us a bunch of panzies:

To all twitterers , if u c me n public come say hi, we r not the same we r from twitteronia, we connect

Not to be outdone "The Real Nash" wrote:

Diesel, 5 n diner has great chili and milkshakes but i know you're on a diet so you had a salad!!

2009-01-17T11:47:00.006-06:00

New Dog!

We took the plunge and adopted a new dog from the Animal Humane Society. We named her Nelli in memory of my Grandpa Ron Vannelli who passed away last week after a tough few years fighting corticobasal degeneration, a neurological disorder similar to Parkinson's. The wake and funeral were very touching talking to a ton of family and friends and hearing some great old stories. Afterwards Gabe's by the Park hosted a closed memorial and we filled the entire place. More rembrances, a bunch of old timers down to his newest great grandchildren. We had some laughs, a few beers and some good pasta. Just like he would have wanted.

As I said we met Nelli at the Golden Valley Animal Humane Society which is great facility. It's a huge complex that cares for a ton of animals and helped make the adoption process easy with some great volunteers. She's a two year old pit bull found as a stray. She had just weaned puppies and we fear she may have been tossed aside after the puppies but we don't really know. She has a great temperment and just loves to cuddle so we did some research, (more here, here and here)called the insurance guy (did you know some home owners insurances will drop people for owning pit bulls?)and picked her up the next day. She has been really good despite the cold weather which is tough with her short coat. Only one accident, and no chewing, barking or any aggressive behavior. She has made friends with just about everyone who has come over, including the pizza girl and a NARAL campaigner plus the few dogs we've met at Petco and on walks.

2009-01-08T10:31:00.002-06:00

A couple of interesting stories lately, thought I'd link to them rather than nothing. I'm horribly unqualified to give an opinion on the Economic Downturn TM, but I think this article is pretty interesting and sets out clearly alot of ideas that I would like to think I would have gotten to with some time, research, ambition, etc.

Why haven't I heard Bill James take on the BCS before? Seems like he would be an authority and he cuts right through it here.

Nicole accidently sent LinkedIn invites to everybody in her address book the other day so I signed up. It's basically just a facebook for your career and it's got some interesting stuff in there so I'll might end up using it. Turns out I know a decent amount of people in there with a few quick searches. Anyways, that's not the interesting part, what led me to post on this was the acute occurance of the Baader-Meinhof phenomenon. I had never heard of LinkedIn and I surf the internet all day at work and I'm fairly plugged into whats going on even if I'm not particpating. For example, I've heard of Twitter a while back, I never signed up or used it or anything but I was aware of it's existence. Not with LinkedIn. Anyways an hour after Nicole sends me the link I see a deadspin commentator mention it. Next I see another article mentioning it, and then I click on the NY times story about the top ten sites for IT pros in '09 and number 1 is, you guessed it, LinkedIn. Hilariously when I click on the "share" button next to the article it offers options to, well, share the story the first option is through LinkedIn. I give up.

2009-01-07T22:47:00.002-06:00

Some new local music caught my ear tonight. Although I am loathe to visit a myspace page, this was the easiest way to link to the song. Check it out: Hyder Ali w/ Paper Dolls

2008-11-05T15:42:00.002-06:00

Apparently this is news the day following the most historic election in our history - courtesy of the Star Trib... I agree.... but how did it make the quick links on Nov 5?

http://www.startribune.com/business/33900064.html?elr=KArksLckD8EQDUoaEyqyP4O:DW3ckUiD3aPc:_Yyc:aU7EaDiaMDCiUI

2008-10-25T11:54:00.001-05:00

Whoa

2008-10-18T11:08:00.001-05:00

Dubay in the clank

Report: KFAN radio host arrested

October 18, 2008

KFAN Radio on-air personality Jeff Dubay reportedly has been arrested on Wednesday by Maplewood police for drug possession.

In a report attributed to the Ramsey County Sheriff's Office, Dubay was released and charges are pending.

Dubay, 40, of Plymouth, is co-host of "P.A. And Dubay," a late-morning weekday sports show he does with Paul Allen.

He also co-hosts the Vikings post-game show on KFAN, analyzing the game and taking calls from listeners.

-- Staff Report

Is anybody watching this shit?

2008-10-12T16:20:00.001-05:00

42 degrees in Denver today

2008-10-12T16:16:00.001-05:00

MMJ

2008-10-11T14:52:00.001-05:00

Golf trip

2008-10-11T14:50:00.000-05:00

I'm old

2008-10-11T14:48:00.001-05:00

2008-10-08T09:23:00.000-05:00

Pwned

2008-09-06T13:55:00.001-05:00

The Crease

Crease
Uploaded by luvnews

2008-09-06T12:33:00.000-05:00

Wiffle

Holy smokes

2008-09-03T12:14:00.001-05:00

WTF?

It might be tough to see but the sign on the side of that bus reads: "Closeted Gay Republican Tour 2008" and the back says " Gay Republicans Get Behind Us"

This RNC deal is getting awesomer by the day.

Olympic radio

2008-08-19T21:57:00.001-05:00

I could probably say a lot of things about how ridiculous the Olympic
radio coverage is and me for listening to it, but I'll leave you with
just one for now. Can we figure out this fucking Bei zshing / Bei-
ging thing? Why can't we have some foreign city pronunciation
uniformity?

I can haz cheeseburger?

2008-08-16T20:46:00.000-05:00

2008-08-14T19:11:00.001-05:00

Sweet space shuttle launch

16th floor

2008-08-08T15:27:00.000-05:00

Can some explain this crazy ass butterfly that was flapping around the
window of my 16th floor cube? Minneapolis is crazy. Maybe one day I'll
do some legimate posts on all the crazy shit I see daily. New York
must be retarded.

2008-07-30T11:50:00.000-05:00

Bill O'Reilly getting a little torqued up.

Wedding fun

2008-07-18T14:50:00.000-05:00

Bat-mania

2008-07-18T14:44:00.000-05:00

2008-07-18T14:00:00.002-05:00

Stouffers' Introduces Radical New Ad Campaign, Raises Eyebrows.

In a move to intended to "match the cutting edge nature of Stouffer's products" Stouffer exec's released the above banner. Instead of the usual "click here" banner they utilize reverse pyschology by adding a script style "don't" in front. Gen X'ers no doubt jaded by the saturation of banner adds will be intrigued and forced to do the opposite and click to find out more about frozen microwavable sandwich treats.

Marketing Director, Dick Jerkface is laughing all the way to the bank. "In the past our advertising wasn't connecting with young people. People weren't clicking where we would like. This way the kids can feel they aren't doing what we want and still provide them with up to date information on presertive laden instant food products. It's pure genius."

The linked site includes a newsletter designed to keep you current on the latest 20 cent coupons. Plus wacky games and a social networking aspect. People can stay connected, interact with other processed consummible fans and access a "Stouff' Yer Face" section where users are able to post pictures of themselves eating Stouffer's.

2008-07-08T15:13:00.002-05:00

Political Lies and the Lying Liars who tell them.

The Obama campaign said Monday night that the solicitation does not constitute a raffle. "We are not conducting a raffle of any kind," said Nick Kimball, a spokesman for the Obama campaign in Minnesota.

The Obama website, which is soliciting funds of up to $2,300, says anyone who makes a contribution to the Obama campaign of $5 or more between now and July 31 "could be one of 10 supporters chosen to meet Barack backstage" in Denver.

It further says that the 10 selected supporters can bring a guest and will be flown to Denver to spend two days at the Democratic Party national convention, including hearing Obama's speech on Aug. 28...

...He said three elements make a drawing a form of gambling under state law: if it costs money to participate, if it involves "the luck of the draw" in which no skill is involved and if one wins something of value.

Although one commenter made a valid point - that the chance to attend the August 28 speech could be considered a prize of no value.

Remember kids.... vote or Diddy will kill you.

2008-04-08T14:43:00.002-05:00

A couple of selections from the freezer section of a Hong Kong grocery store courtesy of your resident world traveler, Mike Honcho. The details are fantastic.

2008-04-06T10:44:00.000-05:00

A Great American Hero - RIP

2008-04-04T17:07:00.004-05:00

What on earth is going on in Mpls-St. Paul?

Click it to see the full size image.

Test

2008-04-04T12:49:00.000-05:00

I am trying to add content and functionality to the blog. Here is a
hot pic of me with my headset at work. taken by me with my phone and
then emailed to the blog. If this works, expect to see more pictures
from me along with my sarcastic comments. I'll send out the email
address privately to those that want it because, as of right now, it
is set to post automatically without any review...

2008-04-04T11:32:00.005-05:00

Lottery Winner Shocks World, Quits Job

LANSING, Mich.- David Sneath, A Ford Motor Co. worker shocked the world yesterday when he quit his job after winning the lottery. "He has been working here for ever," Mitch Fritzcek a younger co-worker said, "I don't know what we are going to do without him".

"Shocked, yeah that is the best way to describe it," said Dave Zmorgen, his long time manager, "When he won the lottery we were all excited, hootin and hollerin, but then he dropped the bomb".

David's manager went on to say they would piece together coverage of his shift until a replacement can be hired. "We're all going to have to pitch in to replace David, that's the cold hard truth".

Sneath continued to "think outside of the box" with his plans to give some money to his friends and buy some stuff for himself.

Carol Sneath, David's wife of 24 years is a little concerned. "It has just been a crazy roller coaster. Winning money is great, but I'm ready for the madness to stop."

I spoke with several Psychiatric and Economic experts to see what their thoughts were on this outragous behavior. They were split on whether "the madness" will stop, but agreed the man would burn through the cash in 5-7 years and almost certainly divorce her. Other predictions from our round table included, "Continued, escalated gambling", "Drug problems" and "trail of dead hookers".

The Associated Press provided content for this story

I watch CNN all day at work and read Yahoo News headlines on my way to my fantasy sports' leagues. They drive me insane with there constant, vapid, and poorly done stories. It is a bit Onion-ey, but still carthartic. Look for "Yahoo! News - Teeb's! Take" to possibly become a recurring bit, as well as an as to be named music segmant and a long overdue site make over. Exiting? Yes. Hold your breath? Probably not.

2008-04-01T15:58:00.000-05:00

I just copied this from the Bill Simmons mailbag.... What ever happened to our bar olympics. For that matter, what happened to Dirks? Let's get something going.. we're all going soft.

Q: Ten of my friends and I officially started and are taking part in the "Man of the Year Competition," where each participant selects a random, shenanigan-filled contest in which we all compete. Examples of events we have planned: retaking the SATs, a chili cook-off, parallel parking contest, and a paintball pistol duel at dawn. (We took the SATs last week and all feel confident that we are smarter than we were in high school.) As awesome as this is, we have a problem. We can't decide what the 10th event should be, which is required to take place in Las Vegas. What would you suggest? Please keep in mind that the purpose of the Man of the Year Competition is to promote three ideals: shenanigans, self-improvement and debauchery (though not necessarily all of them at the same time).

2008-03-19T19:48:00.002-05:00

Incredible DMX interview

You must read the whole thing but here are some pretty great excerpts. The most amazing party:

Are you following the presidential race?
Not at all.

You’re not? You know there’s a Black guy running, Barack Obama and then there’s Hillary Clinton.
His name is Barack?!

Barack Obama, yeah.
Barack?!

Barack.
What the fuck is a Barack?! Barack Obama. Where he from, Africa?

Yeah, his dad is from Kenya.
Barack Obama?

Yeah.
What the fuck?! That ain’t no fuckin’ name, yo. That ain’t that nigga’s name. You can’t be serious. Barack Obama. Get the fuck outta here.

You’re telling me you haven’t heard about him before.
I ain’t really paying much attention.

I mean, it’s pretty big if a Black…
Wow, Barack! The nigga’s name is Barack. Barack? Nigga named Barack Obama. What the fuck, man?! Is he serious? That ain’t his fuckin’ name. Ima tell this nigga when I see him, “Stop that bullshit. Stop that bullshit” [laughs] “That ain’t your fuckin’ name.” Your momma ain’t name you no damn Barack.

So you’re not following the race. You can’t vote right?
Nope.

Is that why you’re not following it?
No, because it’s just—it doesn’t matter. They’re gonna do what they’re gonna do. It doesn’t really make a difference. These are the last years.

But it would be pretty big if we had a first Black president. That would be huge.
I mean, I guess…. What, they gon’ give a dog a bone? There you go. Ooh, we have a Black president now. They should’ve done that shit a long time ago, we wouldn’t be in the fuckin’ position we in now. With world war coming up right now. They done fucked this shit up then give it to the Black people, “Here you take it. Take my mess.”

Right, exactly.
It’s all a fuckin’ setup. It’s all a setup. All fuckin’ bullshit. All bullshit. I don’t give a fuck about none of that.

We could have a female president also, Hillary Clinton.
I mean, either way it doesn’t matter. I don’t care. No one person is directly affected by which president, you know, so what does it matter.

Yeah, but the country is.
I guess. The president is a puppet anyway. The president don’t make no damn decisions.

The president…they don’t have that much authority basically?
Nah, never.

But Bush pretty much…
You think Bush is making fuckin’ decisions?

He did, yeah, he fucked up the country.
He act like he making decisions. He could barely speak! He could barely fuckin’ speak!
Can’t be serious. He ain’t making no damn decisions.

Well Barack has a good chance of winning so that might be something.
Good for him, good for him.

...

Do you think it’s a good thing that Southern music is pretty much dominating the game? There’s no cats from New York, you know. It seems like there hasn’t been in awhile. What do you think about that?
What do I think about Southern music?

Yeah.
I really don’t think about it.

You don’t think about it?
I really don’t care for it. To focus on other shit is a fuckin’ headache.

...

What were you doing in between—from the last album to this one, that whole time? What have you been up to?
Life. I been up to that. It’s been crazy. Fuckin’ police keep on fuckin’ raiding my house and shit for nothing. They took all my fuckin’ guns. All they did is take is take my guns. All they fuckin’ do is fuck my house up and take my guns. That’s all they did. Straight robbed me—that’s what they did.

...

There was a video on the Internet recently, I don’t know if you saw it, like with you in the studio.
Nah, didn’t see it.

It was like you in the studio and I guess some other producer and you were recording some songs and you were talking about some random stuff. Do you remember that?
Yeah, I think so.

People were really concerned about you or whatever.
That was a while ago. I didn’t see it.

Do you remember when you were in the studio?
Vaguely. I’d just flown in or something. I know I was tired as a muthafucka.

Tired from recording?
I just flew in. I just flew in.

Do you worry about people getting the wrong perception of you?
No, I really don’t. People could say what they want. I don’t really care. I don’t give a fuck.

Clearly, yeah.
Anything that’s not positive, I don’t have the energy to focus on it. Anything that’s not going in the right direction I don’t have the time or the energy. If somebody step to my face, I’ma take care of ’em, that’s something different. What people think, I don’t give a fuck about none of that shit ’cause they ain’t putting money in my pocket. They ain’t taking no money out of my pocket. They all suck dick when they see me so it really doesn’t matter.

...

How’s your family and your kids?
They’re good. My son is rapping now.

Did he see you? I’m sure he was inspired by you.
Yeah, yeah. all that. Took him to shows and everything.

What does your wife Tashera think about him rapping?
She likes it. She’s the one who told me. She told me.

Did you talk to him? What do you tell him about the industry? Do you give him advice about the industry?
He knows it, he knows all that shit. Ah, man. I give him some advice.

What kind of advice do you give him? Like, watch out for, you know…
Advice about life, advice about girls, whatever a father would tell his son. Everything. Advice about everything. Everything. Advice about everything.

...

All right, well is there anything else that I missed? Anything that you’re working on?
Working on life.

Working on life.
Yeah, working on life.

Are you happy right now?
I don’t wanna be happy.

Why not?
’Cause when you happy you get locked in sleep. You get sleepy happy. I always wanna be on point. I always wanna be aware.

Right, ’cause when you’re happy you think you’re safe and you don’t…
Yeah, you get sleepy happy.

It really is amazing:

http://www.xxlmag.com/online/?p=20332

2008-03-14T07:35:00.004-05:00

I haven't even watched this. I pulled up yahoo this morning to check on my fantasy hockey duel with Dircks and the front page headline at yahoo was "Is corn making you fat?" I'm not sure if this has anything to do with Michael Pollen's work. As some of you know, I've read and enjoyed both The Omnivore's Dilemma and In Defense Of Food . For me it started vaguely, hearing something about McDonald's burgers explaing why kids were getting bigger and taller. Something to do with the growth hormones in the meat. Not really something that would effect my decision to eat there. Then I think the backlash against fast food started to pick up steam with Supersize Me breaking through. I never saw it, but I get the idea from some clips here and there and what I have seen that it may be slightly off for me in that Michael Moore vein- kind of losing his impact by being showy or funny and letting their bias for the topic show clearly. I think when you are trying to be subversive and go against "the powers that be" it can be counter-productive to be cocky. Anyways, I'm sure it codemns the hell out of McDonald's food as that isn't difficult these days. A better bet for that, and fast food as a whole was Fast Food Nation.
The book kills the movie of the same name like an immigrant kills a diseased cow at the meat packers (or Javier Bardem in No Country! Was that some kind of comment on industrialized meat packing? I just thought it was a cool way to kill people...the Coen brothers kick ass.). Anyways the movie is isn't that bad, it's just the book is so comprehensive and damning. This is what actually got me to start making choices about food. Have I been to a fast food joint since? Yes. Have I been to McDonald's? Yes, sadly, probably more so than other places. I think Pollen's books, while not perfect, really brought it all together for me. He looks at modern eating and food comprehensively. The questions he poses in Omnivore he trys to answer in Defense. While it is fascinating to see him skewer what we claim to know about nutrition (basically debunking the concept as we know it), it just as frustrating following his guidelines, which in some ways could be considered fallible as well, not to mention less accessible and more expensive. Anyways, my point was supposed to be: knowing what I know now, or knowing what I believe to be true, why am I not acting on it? I've made some changes and I am trying to do some things differently. I sit back when I see videos like this and say "Oh, I've read about that, I've known about this". I see commercials like Wendy's one about knowing what their food is, their whole campaign about being "wayyy better than fast food", it makes me want to talk about how bullshit that is and comment on how even the fast food places are picking up on this trend. But who cares? If I'm not changing my diet it basically just adds guilt to certain eating choices. As if anyone needs more of that. This is going longer and less focused by the minute. Let's just watch the clip for now.

2008-03-10T13:24:00.001-05:00

Ludacris' Hoes by Area Code

2008-02-26T20:16:00.002-06:00

NBC pulls head out of ass, starts working with bloggers:

I wish this was working when I was desperately trying to rewatch the douche bag awards from last fall.

2008-01-22T20:24:00.000-06:00

I think I like Netflix's dead people better than Congo's. Plus; $4.99! That's cheap!

2008-01-22T09:48:00.000-06:00

Bill has a "Dream"

Another great one for nobody to watch.

2008-01-16T23:54:00.000-06:00

Not sure if anyone still reads this page, but I thought this video was hilarious.

2008-01-08T22:38:00.000-06:00

Apple hooks up free shipping

I was playing around with the new Power Mac's and they have some downright stupid conifguration options. For a mere 9000 dollars you could upgrade to 32gb of RAM. In case you want to edit a full feature Pixar movie, a Planet Earth HD video, and still have your itunes rockin.

2008-01-04T14:15:00.000-06:00

I haven't watched this because I am at work but I want to remember to so, presto blogo!

All right. Not that funny. Oh well.

2007-12-07T09:31:00.000-06:00

Fantasy American Gladiators League.

As I'm sure you have all seen and geared up for, NBC is bringing back American Gladiators. I have been thinking about making up a fantasy league similar to those available for Project Runway, Survivor, Idol, etc....

Unfortunately, the only information on line is that the hosts are Hulk Hogan and Laila Ali and that if you go to a live taping, be prepared to be bored and not be able to see anything. So, I haven't exactly formulated the league rules.

I was thinking that if you could get a list of the gladiators, you could choose gladiators prior to the show and get points based on events participated in, W's and L's, margin of victory depending on event or others. Also, according to the lame ass website there will be a stronger focus on the stories behind the contestants, and they get to train for the event. You could also put the same metrics in for the contestants.

My question to the blogosphere - who's coming with me? Anyone interested in this sweet new fantasy adventure? If so, help me identify scoring options.

I also think we should start a grassroots campaign to see if we can get one of the gladiators to be named "the shocker" and he can run around throwing the shocker sign up and see how long before NBC execs figure it out.

2007-12-04T19:32:00.001-06:00

More vids. Carl from ATHF on the BCS Part 1 and Part 2. Why didn't I just link directly to adultswim? Because this was easier, that's why. Jerk.

Anyways, how about a Nintendo nostalgia video? Yeah I kind of had the feeling I've seen a million of these, but this one is solid.

I don't remember a movie that has alternated from embarrassing spoof to hilarious epic so quickly and so often. Make sure you check out the 3o second version too.

2007-12-04T10:53:00.000-06:00

Wow, what a dead zone. In lieu of any prose/rants/diatribes/analysis/mumblings or anything really, I'll just post some horse videos.

This link probably won't work for long:

Thumbelina

If it doesn't work you can try:

Before she was an international star and philanthropist, Thumbelina was put in a cage and prodded at by shrieking kids. It's a feel good story.

2007-10-26T10:03:00.000-05:00

Some of you may have been privy to Whistler and I's conversation after hearing the Solider Boy song for the first time and seriously considering whether the artist was mentally challenged, taking part in some weird hip hop make-a-wish thing. While I haven't investigated this enough to disprove our hypothesis, I saw some bridesmaids doing the dance at a recent wedding and stumbled on this video of Bo Ryan the Wisconsin basketball coach.

2007-10-12T09:39:00.000-05:00

Golf Trip Pics are up!

2007-09-30T11:32:00.000-05:00

Finally got around to posting the photos from the last couple of events. This webshots.com is pretty easy. I've got photos from Andrew and Jenny's wedding, Bonanza and the cabin trip form early August. Plus videos, I haven't even watched all the videos so I not sure if they are any good or not.

Here's the link to my main album page. 50 new pics plus 10 vids.

2007-09-26T15:23:00.000-05:00

12-foot, 550-pound hammerhead shark caught on a beach in Florida - with a rod and reel.

2007-09-24T19:01:00.001-05:00

2007-09-18T09:42:00.000-05:00

University of Florida student tased at John Kerry forum.

2007-08-27T17:25:00.000-05:00

I still can't figure out how to embed. This is painful....

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lj3iNxZ8Dww

2007-08-05T21:12:00.001-05:00

Alright everybody! Gather 'round! The Candyman is here! What kind of candy do you want? Sweet chocolate? Chocolate malted candy? Gumdrops?

2007-08-01T16:32:00.000-05:00

"There are no such thing as shark attacks"

From Gilbert Arenas' blog:

I know this is random, but I just want to clear this up for people out there.

There are these things called shark attacks, but there is no such thing as a shark attack. I have never seen a real shark attack.

I know you’re making a weird face as you’re reading this. OK people, a shark attack is not what we see on TV and what people portray it as.

We’re humans. We live on land.

Sharks live in water.

So if you’re swimming in the water and a shark bites you, that’s called trespassing. That is called trespassing. That is not a shark attack.

A shark attack is if you’re chilling at home, sitting on your couch, and a shark comes in and bites you; now that’s a shark attack. Now, if you’re chilling in the water, that is called invasion of space. So I have never heard of a shark attack.

When I see on the news where it’s like, “There have been 10 shark attacks,” I’m like, “Hey, for real?! They’re just running around? Sharks are walking now, huh! We live on the land, we don’t live underwater.”

http://www.nba.com/blog/gilbert_arenas.html

2007-07-27T09:31:00.000-05:00

It's been fairly well documented that I'm lacking spice, meaning, sex and competition in my life, and I'm looking to do something about at least three of those four things in the coming months.

I'm thinking of kind of a olympics of bar games, board games, rec games, etc.

2 person teams. Events could be Darts, Pool, Bocce, Trivial Pursuit, Golden Tee, Silver Strike, NHL Hockey, Fussball, maybe golf, poker, some other board game, etc.

It would take place over a couple weekends and have a scoring system more complex than then the Russian figure skating scoring system.

Thoughts? Interest? Games to suggest? Hate the idea, and as a result of that, hate me?

Get at me.

I'd like to get at least 4 or 5 two person teams, but obviously the more the merrier.

2007-07-25T17:42:00.001-05:00

1,500 Filipino Inmates Do 'Thriller'

From the blog I found it on:

The population of an entire Philippines prison re-enacts Michael Jackson’s famous Thriller video. 1,500 Filipinos jostling around like zombies, then breaking into spontaneous dance when they corner Filipino Michael Jackson and his transvestite “girlfriend.”

Honestly, I’m speechless: this is one of the greatest things I’ve ever seen on the Internet. According to the YouTube page, this is practice, not the final version.

http://www.ectomo.com/?p=361

2007-07-22T12:57:00.000-05:00

So for the second straight day I am serious hung over. College style drinking, post college body = bad news bears. I then decide that I should go to the corner store for breakfast. After wandering and window shopping for a while - I decide the best direction to go is a can of cream soda and microwaveable twin chili cheese dogs - both on clearance. Pretty sure my stomach and ass are going to explode into one disgusting poopy mess - I'm posting this as an apology to whoever finds me......

PS = play that "this is why I'm hot" song at my funeral.

2007-07-21T17:20:00.000-05:00

Vincent, Jules, and Mia

Krissy and I were watching Pulp Fiction last night when I brought up Halloween '99 in Madison. To my surprise, not only was she also in Madison for that Halloween, but she said that she had pictures. I didn't think that any photos existed of these costumes, but she quickly proved me wrong after she dug up this pic.

Pretty much as cool as I remembered. Now if I could only find a picture of Andy in the middle of the street in a three-point stance staring down the grill of a car...

2007-07-19T17:20:00.000-05:00

I'm going out of town for the weekend, so here's your friday fun day fun time early. Watch me dominate at goaltending, then at transition at the end.

My nickname at boots is The Most, by the way. My hair in some of those shots is priceless as well.

Dominant.

2007-07-18T18:39:00.000-05:00

Chocolate Malted Candies????

Required viewing: Somewhere Over the Rainbow and Candyman. The rest are extra credit....

http://www.youtube.com/results?search_query=zach+allen

PS - Tom sat here and tried to embed this and it didn't work, so all you haters (I'll refrain from using names due to political agendas) can get fucked.

2007-07-16T17:35:00.000-05:00

A representative from the U of M police department just said this on the evening news - in relation to charges filed against Dominic Jones.

"....a cell phone video showed Dominic Jones finishing a sex act on the face of an unconscious female victim, which obviously took the investigation in an unexpected direction....."

I bet he had a boner behind the podium.

2007-07-14T13:12:00.000-05:00

I somehow took this pic of a couple of rockets going off. That's Greg to the left and barely visible is Drew to the right. These guys shot of sweet fireworks for a long time up at the Ave' cabin two weeks ago.

Here are links to some videos I took of the festivities.

1, 2, 3, 4

2007-07-14T12:45:00.001-05:00

It was 3 or 4 in the morning when we decided to get the octagon going at Ryan's cabin.

2007-07-13T14:11:00.000-05:00

Holy. Shit.

2007-07-12T22:22:00.000-05:00

Once again, Nickelback leads to an epiphany.

In the song about being a rockstar, there is a line that goes "I'd even cut my hair and change my name..."

I think it's a shot a Garth Brooks.

Some of you may remember the Chris Gaines deal, but for those who don't, he basically cut his hair, changed his name to Chris Gaines and sang rock songs.

Look at this douche:

Here's a better history of the whole deal, from his wiki:

In 1999 Brooks and his production company Red Strokes Entertainment, with Paramount Pictures, began to develop a movie in which Brooks would star. The Lamb was to have revolved around Chris Gaines, a fictional rock singer and his emotionally conflicted life as a musician in the public eye. To create buzz for the project, Brooks took on the identity of Gaines in the October 1999 album Garth Brooks In ... The Life of Chris Gaines, which was intended as a 'pre-soundtrack' to the film.^[27] Brooks also subsequently appeared as Gaines in a television mockumentary for the VH1 series Behind The Music and as the musical guest on an episode of Saturday Night Live which he hosted as himself.

Brooks' endless promotion of the album and the film did not seem to stir much excitement and the success of the Chris Gaines experiment became fairly evident mere weeks after the album was released. Although critics admired Brooks for taking a musical risk, the majority of the American public was either totally bewildered, or completely unreceptive to the idea of Garth Brooks as anything but a pop-country singer.^[28] Many of his fans also felt that by supporting the Gaines project they would lose the real Garth Brooks.^[29] Sales of the album were unspectacular and although it made it to #2 on the pop album chart, expectations had been higher and retail stores began heavily discounting their oversupply.^[30] Dismal sales of the album and lack of interest in the film brought the film production to an indefinite hiatus in February 2001 and Gaines quickly and quietly faded into obscurity.^[31]

So, that said that people were pretty unreceptive to it, the movie never arrived, and a lot of people were bewildered. Why does he not get more shit for this stunt? If this was someone like Justin Timberlake, he'd have been strung up by the tabloids at this point. Some how, Garth gets a freebie on it.

Fuck Garth Brooks and Chris Gaines.

At least Nickelback knows where it's at.

2007-07-11T08:16:00.001-05:00

Some links for you to look at:

First off, here are the players closest to Torii Hunter according to Baseball Reference:

Similar Players

I'm getting more and more frightened that we're going to give him a lot of money.

-Here's a pretty interesting collection of weird pictures from Google Earth.

-This is the very dirty, very not safe for work trailer for "Superbad". Funny as fuck.

-Here is SuperGreg

-If you're into sweet NHL 94' passing plays set to serious electronic music, then click this

-This guy has skills similar to mine, only Creed doesn't play in the background when I'm on a breakaway.

2007-07-10T12:52:00.001-05:00

One of the best article headlines ever - and it's from ESPN - not The Onion...

Double-amputee to compete in able-bodied sprint

I don't know how to tag otherwise I would have tagged both double-amputee and able-bodied.

2007-06-29T10:57:00.000-05:00

In celebrity news, RBC HR Services gets a shot with T.C. the bear. Why is the Twins mascot a bear? Not sure.

Rob Van Winkle was unavailable for comment.

2007-06-28T07:08:00.000-05:00

I have just awoken from a pretty interesting dream.

Picture a state of the art facility on the shores of a lake in northern Minnesota, or New York, or Montana, or wherever it is pristine and people would want to vacation.

Now picture a legion of 20 to 30 something geeks all over that facility talking about fantasy sports while fishing, drinking and generally having a good time.

It's Fantasy Sports Camp.

In my dream I was not attending this camp, but instead had some administrative role with the whole thing that was undefined.

Anyway, think about it. Seminars and or classes for theory/drafting/trading/projecting/etc. for all fantasy sports. Keynote speeches by experts, Diamond Mind and Strat-O-Matic tournaments and strategy sessions, the possibilities are endless.

If ESPN or someone with similar clout and the resources to do it went ahead with this, I think it could be kind of a big deal. Just googling fantasy sports camps brings up a million sites for the other style of fantasy camps, the sporting style, where adults pay huge sums of money to play basketball with Kareem Abdul-Jabbar, or baseball with Kent Hrbek. This idea is no more preposterous than those.

And, before you comment, yes, I realize I'm a huge nerd, dork, spaz, geek, haven't seen a girl naked in ages, etc. Get over yourselves.

2007-06-25T22:40:00.001-05:00

Okay, now that I know how to post these videos... Apparently other people have seen this one before, but I just saw it and I was rolling on the floor.

Look at me! I'm a posting machine!

Dance Time!

2007-06-24T23:29:00.001-05:00

Okay, so I finally figured out how to post a fucking YouTube video on the goddamn blog. So enjoy.

2007-06-24T23:01:00.000-05:00

I can't for the fucking life of me figure out how to embed YouTube videos in this fucking blog. But whatever, just go to this link. Its a mildly amusing video of me and the rest of the History Day staff showing off our dance moves.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zM0_ZDDvHjs

2007-06-21T16:46:00.001-05:00

Kickboxing kangaroos on a golf course

Yup, pretty awesome.

2007-06-21T14:46:00.000-05:00

June 6th marked my 6 year anniversary of my employment at Lettermen Sports. It's weird to think that I was living with Blade, Teeblah, Handsteam, and MnRaul when I started. I was just a pup for cryin' out loud.

Anyway, I got a little reflective/retrospective/whatever that day, thinking about the job, my life, etc. and I wondered if I'd ever work anywhere else, or have a 'different' job as it were.

So that's the question. Most or all of us have hit the mid to late 20's, finished schooling, etc. Do you see yourself having another job/career in your life? Or is where you are at where you are at, so to speak. Obviously there are promotions and such within your own field or job that wouldn't apply here, I'm strictly speaking of a big/different move, like if I went and worked for the Gap or something. What do you think? Are you depressed? Is it over? Is what you're driving to in the morning the same thing you're going to be hover-drafting to in the morning in 30 years?

It's really hard for me to answer my own question. I really can't see myself doing anything else at this point, but I guess it makes me want to carve a new hole into my ass when I think about doing what I'm doing in 30 years. I guess I'm banking on Lettermen to become a massive profit making machine, in which case I'll be in on the ground floor and be in a better situation than I am at the moment, but that's quite a bit to bank on.

Anyway, think about it.

By the way, how fun are the tags? I like tagging the very random stuff, thereby defeating the entire purpose of the tags themselves.

2007-06-15T21:53:00.000-05:00

I Got a Crush on Obama

2007-06-12T22:25:00.001-05:00

Sopranos?

Thoughts? I'd rather hear from people who have actually watched it through the years...

2007-06-08T09:53:00.000-05:00

Hunter: Mauer's a pussy

"I think some people take pain in different ways," Twins center fielder Torii Hunter said. "Some people have to play at 100 percent, and Joe may be one of those guys. I've seen it happen. Joe is a good player, and he wants to perform at 100 percent, not at 80 percent.

"Me, I grew up in a different time. I'm ready to play no matter what -- broken toe, hamstring, groin, back -- and that's the mentality I've grown to have."

http://www.startribune.com/twins/story/1232024.html

2007-06-01T09:34:00.000-05:00

Okay, Friday Fun Time!

All/some of you may know about my early Saturday morning boot/street hockey league. I play with some older guys that are really into it, and the 'leader' of it all goes so far as to tape the games and edit it into an end of year highlight video that is sexy to watch while drinking. Anyway, he has recently released some older highlights on you tube. This is one of my favorites, the Dircks brothers meltdown on April Fools' Day, 2006. Enjoy.

2007-05-28T12:07:00.000-05:00

Stop, collaborate and listen

How cool am I? I hang with Vanilla Ice! Deal with it.

2007-05-25T18:02:00.000-05:00

'Bigger than Hogzilla'

Holy shit. That's a big hog.

Taken with that .50 caliber revolver the kid is holding.

http://www.abcnews.go.com/US/wireStory?id=3213852

2007-05-21T22:53:00.000-05:00

I was listening to the radio the other day at work and one of my favorite lines ever came through the speaker and tickled the erogenous zone in my ear:

“Hey, this is Chad from Nickelback and you’re listening to ….”

You can insert any station in there, it doesn’t matter what their format is, because Nickelback transcends musical classification/formats.

I started thinking about Chad, his sweet perm thing, and Nickelback’s music. It’s shitty music. Almost everyone I know believes this to be true. Why then, have they sold 12.5 million albums in the US alone? Does anyone reading this know anyone who has bought any of their albums? I don’t think I do.

Anyway, while looking up how many records they’ve sold, I came across the lists of all-time record sales, and I found it interesting.

For instance, the #1 album in US sales of all time is…. The Eagles (Greatest Hits 1971-1975). These dudes sold 29 million albums of their best songs written in a 4 year period. 29,000,000, incidentally, happens to be the population of Iraq (28,993,000). They are followed by Michael Jackson (Thriller), Led Zeppelin (Led Zeppelin IV), Pink Floyd (The Wall), and AC/DC (Back in Black). Only 2 of the top five bands/artists are actually American.

The Eagles actually have the #15 album as well, with Hotel California. Hotel California sold 16 million albums, the same amount as Elton John’s greatest hits, Physical Graffiti by Led Zeppelin, No Fences by Garth Brooks, Alanis Morrissette’s Jagged Little Pill and the Hootie and the Fucking Blowfish opus, Cracked Rear-View. Hootie may have been my biggest WTF moment, but others soon followed, like the Backstreet Boys with 14 million sold (Backstreet Boys), then another 13 million with Millennium, which tied with Britney Spears and …Baby One More Time. Speakerboxx/The Love Below, possibly their worst album, sold 11 million copies. For how big of a celebrity Madonna is, I would have thought she would have sold more than 10 million of a single album of hers, but she never did. Two of her albums hit 10 million, the same total as Linkin Park and the Lion King soundtrack.

As far as cumulative albums sales go though, Madonna ranks #13 with 63 million albums sold, the Beatles rank first with 169 million. The top five, in fact, is the Beatles, Elvis Presley, Garth Brooks, Led Zeppelin and The Eagles. Garth Brooks is the only one that I and most of you can say that we lived in the period in which he/they performed. Mariah Carey is 16^th, one spot ahead of Michael fucking Jackson. Mariah Carey has sold 61.5 million records in the US. Does anyone reading this currently own a Mariah Carey album? Did you know Sade has sold more albums (22.5 million) in the US than Greenday (22 million), Credence Clearwater Revival (22 million), Jimi Hendrix (22 million) or Genesis (21.5 million)? That sounds like the work of the Brain Fucklers.

So what to make out of all of this?

I really can’t say, but Nickelback’s selling 12.5 million albums kind of took a back seat when I saw some of the other batshit that sold more. DMX (14 million)? The Offspring (14.5)? Madness. The buying habits of the American music listeners is(are?) something I'll probably never understand, especially when it comes to entertainment. The fact that Snoop Dogg has only sold 12 million albums, 500,000 less than Nickelback and 4 million less than Limp Bizkit tells me that.

2007-05-21T12:57:00.000-05:00

Sweet ass sexiness.

2007-05-18T07:43:00.001-05:00

Ahhh Friday. How we doing? Do you need that last little push to get you to the weekend? It's time for linkage!

Apparently 150 members of the media have died in Iraq. I realize you can't say "we'll fight over here and you journalists can safely document over there" but still. 2008 can't come fast enough. What a shit bucket, this mess.

Not sure why I jumped out with some half-assed political commentary. We need some funny, how about this? I am seriously thinking about changing my ringtone.

Speaking of ringtones, Brad Neely keeps "bringing the gold". At some point I would imagine the well would dry up on the ridiculously funny, but not yet. It has been interesting to hear who likes this stuff, who loves it, and who could do without. It's like a humor-friend barometer. I am not saying your wrong if you don't like it, or any less of a friend, I am just saying I might require a three page essay explaining why you don't like it. Site your sources, brah.

Speaking of insipid, irrational, self absorbed demands. Check this out. I've attempted to blog a forwarded message here so bear with me. First check out the document that was attached. Now click here for the email string. It starts at the bottom right with the bride sending out the a "bridesmaid contract". I cut it down so you don't have to scroll through the winding path that got it to me and focus on Mike's hilarious comments.

(sorry about those images, i can't get them to not suck right now, i was able to read them when my browser is maximized)

Speaking of hil.. oh forget that. That is annoying. Apparently Bob Odenkirk is working on a new show for superdeluxe.com. The first episode is the video in the middle on the top. The cut the crap promo is also worth your time.

Here some more stuff I found through gorilla mask that is worth a look:

High Times Editiorial Office

Caveman series for ABC (from Geico ads)

I havn't even watched this but I found it looking for something else that has Adam Mckay and Will Ferrell.

This is the 3rd fucking time I had to retype this link. Blogger is acting crazy.

Here is the Will Ferrell thing I was looking for.
and some Pearl out takes for good measure.

Still have atime? Here is the prank war at college humor. If you start with #1 they pretty much explain everything in the videos. Warning: If you watch all five of these videos you may find yourself 40 minutes in the future with no work accomplished.

Speaking of no work accomplished...

2007-05-04T10:37:00.000-05:00

(You can click on it if you can't read the text)

2007-05-03T17:07:00.000-05:00

Major props...

...to whoever can find online video of Cuddyer's somersault the other night. You will forever be in my good graces.

2007-05-01T15:10:00.000-05:00

Legends Shooting:

The story goes as follows....

A couple of kids (late teens, early 20's) were riding their bikes back and forth in front of Legends repeatedly during the afternoon. A regular customer took note of the behavior - and when they entered the bar and proceeded to the restroom - he told the bartender (Chantal) of the suspicious behavior. She asked him to go in to see if they were doing drugs. As he entered the bathroom - he saw in the reflection off the mirror that they were pulling on masks - so he came out and told Chantal they were about to get robbed and to call 911.

A plain clothed, on duty officer was eating at a table about 15-20 feet away from the mens room door. Upon hearing the report from the regular - he pulled out his piece and assumed a ready position. The would be robbers exited the restroom and shouted "give it up". At this point things turned ugly for the robbers.

The officer shouted for them to drop their weapons. They turned (probably surprised as hell) to point their weapons at the officer - who promptly squeezed one off that shattered the gun out of one of the robbers hands. For good measure - the cop squeezed off one more into and out of the same robbers face.

At this point - both suspects ran - one bleeding all over the bar, parking lot, and Jeremy's car. The rode their bikes to their get away car behind Legends near Delmonicos deli on Fillmore and Summer. They drove home and reported an attempted robbery and shooting at their apartment - but when he was taken to the hospital he was identified as the suspect from the Legends incident. The uninjured person is still at large - but apparently identified.

Police found a shotgun stashed on the train tracks behind Legends as well. Probably not how these two had planned things.....

2007-04-27T10:58:00.000-05:00

So I was thinking about the American League and the National League, and how the AL dominated the NL to the tune of a 154-98 record against the NL in interleague play, until the Tigers' pitchers started throwing the ball all over the field and the Cardinals won the World Series last season. For the last few years (at least) the American League has been the better of the two leagues, just as it's been accepted that the NL owned most of the 50's, 60's and 70's. Although there are a lot of talented players in the National League, you have to question any league that allows Kyle Lohse to strike out 12 guys in a game.

Anyway, a lot of research has been done as to why the AL is the superior league at this point, and from what I can gather, most of it has to do with the majority of talent - specifically pitching - migrating to the AL. Another reason I would guess is the bottomless coffers of the Yankees and Red Sox and the rest of the league trying to compete with them or find ways to beat them cheaper (i.e Moneyball, etc.). The Mets seem to be the only team in the NL willing to throw money around.

Anyway, while I was thinking about the baseball deal I realized that there is a definite balance issue in every major sport. Football has the AFC, and hockey and basketball have the Western Conference. Even European soccer has seen the power move to England, as three of the final four teams in the European Champions League play in the English Premiership.

Why is this? What has to happen for entire leagues or conferences to become that much better than the other one?

I started writing this well before I did any sort of meaningful research on the topic so I guess I'm going to throw out a bunch of speculative answers and hope that eventually I can look into this more.

1. Obviously the more you play against top-level talent, the better you're going to get, and the harder you're going to work to keep up with them. All it takes is one real good team in a conference to raise the bar and, eventually, given the resources, others will follow. I'm thinking that the Yankees, Red Wings, Lakers, and Patriots within the last 5-10 years would be the teams that set the tone for their respective leagues/conferences.

2. It may be a front office thing, with the more talented GM's and scouts all happening to be in one league. This is kind of an offshoot of the first theory, with the GM's/scouts essentially 'competing' against each other to build better teams.

3. Does it have something to do with geography? If you do a big picture analysis it doesn't seem to, as most of the good teams in baseball are midwest/east coast based while most of the good hockey and basketball teams are from the west coast, but when you look at individual sports, for some it makes a little more sense. Chris Pronger demanded a trade from cold and snowy Edmonton, a city steeped in hockey lore, to sunny Anaheim so that his wife would stop bitching every day. For two more examples of this phenomenon, see Wayne Gretzky (Edmonton to LA for his actress wife) and David Beckham (dreary old Manchester to sunny Madrid, then LA for Posh Spice). If hockey and basketball players continue to marry bitches who complain about the weather and shopping, you can expect cities with an abundance of good weather and shopping opportunities to land big time free agents. This doesn't necessarily ring true with baseball, -where good teams reside on the cold east coast and picturesque Detroit- but then again baseball is a summer game, and most of the guys have houses in Florida and Arizona anyway. Football is much different, where you have solid teams in places like Indianapolis, Pittsburgh and Baltimore, not exactly winter time destinations.

4. It could be and probably is just a cyclical thing, because it wasn't long ago that the NFC was dominant, the Bulls and Pistons and Celtics were winning titles and the Islanders, Canadiens and Bruins were powerhouses. Bad teams get high draft picks, which turn into ticket sales, which creates money for free agents, etc.

When looking at the four possible theories I've laid out here, I'll take the pussy route and say it's probably a combination of all of these factors as to why certain conferences/leagues are much better than others, and that I've just wasted much of my time as well as yours.

2007-04-24T12:48:00.000-05:00

Docs fight to save man's willy

Holy hell.

HORRIFIED diners watched in shock as a maniac sliced off his manhood in a crowded pizza restaurant.

The 35-year-old Pole burst into the Zizzi eaterie in central London and grabbed a knife from the kitchen.

He then leapt on a table and dropped his trousers as customers fled screaming.

A witness said: “There was blood everywhere. Everyone ran out of the place.”

Surgeons battling to save the severed willy tried to sew it back on in the first UK op of its kind.

Quick-thinking cops recovered the organ from the restaurant floor after subduing its crazed owner with CS gas.

The manhood was packed in ice and taken with the man to London’s St Thomas’s Hospital.

2007-04-23T23:55:00.000-05:00

Halberstam dies in car accident

Wow.

That's a little crazy...

2007-04-19T13:22:00.000-05:00

The exciting life of Tom Boland and co....

The salsbury's are in reference to the chopped and formed beef patties that are in the style of the Hamburg steak - now commonly referred to as hamburger. the office is in reference to the television show that is mildly funny at times, at best, that will no doubt include some played out storyline involving Jim and Pam's never to be romance. Classy night at the Ave'Lallemant/Boland estate.

The reply was that Nicole preferred cooking some hamburger patties in cream of mushroom soup and watching sitcom reruns.

On 4/19/07 1:11 PM, "Boland, Tom (RBC Dain)" wrote:
> Do you want to grill out at Andy's tonight? I think Duffy would be
> there. I told him we were thinking about salsburys and the office.
> What do you think?
>
> Tom Boland
> US HRSC Administrator

I am not saying that hanging out at my house is all that great - but early in the spring when the weather is still novel, and with a potentially great hockey game on a channel that Tom doesn't get - you'd think this would go the other way.....

2007-04-18T10:07:00.000-05:00

BOOGAARD! BOOGAARD! BOOGAARD!

2007-04-18T07:30:00.000-05:00

My mother sent this link to me yesterday, and it was spooky.

For those not down with the sorted details of my childhood, pretty much the exact same thing happened to me about 25 years ago. When it happened to me, though, somehow it was not a national news story.

2007-04-12T22:53:00.000-05:00

This guy directed LA Confidential, Wonder Boys and 8 Mile.

2007-04-10T12:18:00.000-05:00

Joey Gathright jumps some cars

If you read Bill Simmons you've probably already seen this but I found it pretty amazing. The Royals OF has some mad ups.

2007-04-06T09:09:00.000-05:00

Grayson in the cheap seats.

You'd think a long-time Twin Cities sportscaster could get some better seats.

I was going to let Teeblah post about this because his picture was so much better but he's dropped the ball.

***Update***
Apparently Grayson's having some tough luck on the job front. He's got a blog.

And he posts comments on MNSpeak:

And to think I still want to work in television.

My name is Jeff Grayson; I used to be the main sports anchor at KMSP, yes the FOX9 that was called right wing. Actually, that only applies to the Fox News Channel--believe me, there was no right-wing anything during my years there. I was at KMSP 12 years and miss it a great deal after being let go last fall. Like all of you writing on the threads, I am interested to see what happens in the news wars and the Sports Wrap deal. I hope to get back in the game at another station or FSN, but there just aren't enough positions right now. So I watch like the rest of you.

I actually found out about your site when someone told me that somebody posted something about seeing me out and about; the person mentioned I was taller and heavier than he expected, and he was surprised I was buying ink printer cartridges instead of having a laser printer. I'm afraid he's right: I'm 6'4" and could afford to lose a few pounds, and my wife and I do spend more than we'd like on ink cartridges because we thought we couldn't afford a laser printer. For those of you who want me back on the air, thank you. For those of you who are glad I was shown the door, at least you don't have to watch me anymore. I've rambled enough. I look forward to reading and posting!

Sounds like Jeff's having a tough go of it...

2007-04-03T13:51:00.000-05:00

'Good luck, man'

Laraque vs Ivanans. Laraque was mic'd. It's pretty funny.

2007-03-25T13:26:00.000-05:00

There is an article on espn.com in which Oregon's Tajuan Porter (not to be confused with JuJuan - both are clearly of latin descent....) admits that when recruited - he was unaware of the fact that Oregon was a state. This does many things for me:

1. Creates a guarantee that in the unfortunate incident where I have a child - I would suck dicks for cash before allowing said child to be educated in the Detroit public school system.
2. Firms up my previously held theory that the type of individual who is qualified for D-I basketball are extremely studious and devoted to their educations
3. Makes me suspicious that Clem Haskins is somehow involved in "tutoring" the Oregon mens basketball team.
4. Can't we just admit that these fuckers are not there to be educated, don't want to be educated, if graduated - have received no education, and just pay these fuckers and don't waste a seat in a class that some other degree seeking student can't get and has to take an extra semester to graduate but because of the requirement to be full time to qualify for their parents insurance as a dependant over 18 - takes additional unnecessary courses which lead to financial stresses which lead to experimentation and eventual addiction to meth followed by criminal activity to fund said addiction which leads to liquor store robberies and out of control meth fueled get away driving that creates an accident that kills the woman the Dircks would have otherwise married - ending his decade long dry spell in terms of rocking chicks. A butterfly flaps it's wings.......

Side note - was in the VIP section at the Annex last night enjoying absolute vodka at $170 a bottle - which is gay. But - at both corners of our booth there were go-go dancers - so while I conversed with my friends I had a gyrating bikini clad pelvis area coming in and out of my peripheral vision - which is extremely entertaining in terms of unintentional comedy.